No Longer A Gym Shark

Before the global pandemic started, I used to go to the gym non-stop. Even though I never really felt safe exploring new equipment or techniques, I did have a specific routine – get off work, go straight to the gym, 30 mins of cardio to start, lift, abs, then sauna until I couldn't breathe. Or whenever my curls felt moisturized enough for the evening. God forbid I tried to skip a day; I’d lose sleep that very night over the decision I made. Ridiculous? I know, but I thought it made me committed and driven, and maybe there was truth to that. However, this go getter mentality I adopted showed a lack of attention to my mental health and it was becoming present to me.

The new year is here and we’re all trying to find ways to make sure 2021 is the year we manifest our goals. That might not be a struggle for some, but most may feel the pressure and get lost along the way. One goal being obvious is to lose weight or become a healthier version of yourself in the process. The latter, being the most neglected, should be the ultimate goal simply because this idea makes the most change to your everyday life. Start with going to a healthcare professional and seeking guidance but take it a step further by asking many questions and doing your own research. Because who’s going to advocate for you more than you? Nobody, (sang in my best Keith Sweat voice). Seriously though, put yourself in the driver seat in learning what makes your body the best version of itself.

Chasing this ‘high’ of daily accomplishments and constant validation from others solidified that I was doing this right. Like most, I fell victim to social influencers and tv personalities that looked like me but didn't (If you know then you know). I saw myself making changes and decided I should hop on that train and make ‘better use of my time’ trying to be just like them if not similar. This ultimately left me with the questions I asked before – Why the hell am I doing this? If I just keep this up, I would be happy with myself and how I looked. Wrong. I took a step back and did an evaluation. Was I trying to be ‘skinny’ or ‘fit’? If I’m not exhausted by the end, was it really a productive workout? If I didn't train my abs everyday would I have this pudge forever? No, the answer was no! If that was the case, then why did I put this immense amount of pressure on myself? It looks like I wasn't in control of my fitness journey. Instead of solely making this about fitness, I transitioned into making sure my health was my top priority.

I made changes that revolved around my physical and mental health! I started incorporating more variety in my fitness activities, got rid of the gym and all the complications that brought, yet the most important thing that I could have done for myself was change my social feeds to reflect my new outlook. I simply read more, took longer walks, lifted from home, and used other Internet resources to guide me in my health journey.  I listened to my body when it told me to eat, when it was time to put down my phone and take a break, or even take a nap because it was necessary. When I finally realized my body was never going to achieve the same results as the next person, I improved for the better. Breaking free from those constraints my body had gained its control back.

So, am I skinny? Nah! Do I look and feel good though? ABSOLUTELY! And no one can tell me otherwise. Loosening society's grip on ideal body images and expectations has allowed me to change the narrative that puts me behind the wheel. I don’t mean to make this sound laxed because this took work, but just affirming this makes all the difference. I encourage you too to find out what your goals are: If that be to stop eating out as much, benefiting you and your pocketbook, or to read a few books before the year is over, do it. If your goals didn’t change, that is also okay! Work on them this year and the next after that if you have to but allow yourself the grace to focus on the tiny details that prevented you from initially getting them done. Improve in those areas of importance and keep going. I believe in you, you've got this!