DARREN


IT’S FRIDAY NIGHT and I’m trying to finalize these plans for the Henderson account, and I can’t seem to focus on anything other than my next move; to see Kaiden that is. We’ve exchanged a few messages here and there and an occasional meme, but hours of silence seems to be the only outcome from our dry ass texting conversations. I pick up my phone and contemplate whether or not I should hit her line at this time of night, but of course I decide not to. So instead of trying to force another word onto this memo I pack it up for the night and leave some final thoughts to pick up on Monday. Besides, it's the weekend and I don’t know why I’m still here in the office. I straighten up my files before heading towards the elevators and I quickly make my way to my car. I push to start, make my way down the road, and before I even realize it, I’m pulling into the parking space designated for my unit. I sit there for a min and allow my brain to rest because overtime has been killing me and it shows. Maybe I should get a drink tonight. 

I hit a few of my homies and of course these bums don’t reply back quick enough before I decide enough is enough and I should just call Kaiden. But not before I re-read our messages from earlier this week and psych myself out. MF, it is 7:30p on a Friday, relax and dial the damn number. Dorian hits me back and says he’s with his girl right now and I assume that means he can’t escape whatever it is he's doing at the moment. As far as the rest of these clowns, Mike leaves me on read, per usual, and I hit him with an emoji that exemplifies my frustration in the matter. Jay is probably already out, and just getting started at The Lounge, so I decide to not even bother him and let him do his thing. Mentally I’m checked out for the evening anyways so ‘Club Car’ is good enough for me. 

Sitting in my ride I continue to play some music and check my notifications to make sure I didn’t miss anything, and sadly I haven’t. I wonder if she’s even thinking of me. I try to muster up the courage to at least text her but I know that’s not enough at this point. I’ve always been a phone call kind of guy but for some reason I’m finding it extremely hard to make that move with her. I want to hear her; I have to hear her voice. She must want to hear from me, right? Fuck it. I select her name from my last attempt to ask her out under my ‘recents’ and place the phone to my ear. I suffer through the blaring sound long enough for it to ring a handful of times then I quickly hang up before it can reach her voicemail. Silently beating myself up about how stupid that was I’m in utter disbelief that I even did that shit. I mean I didn’t even see if she was available. Great job, Darren. With yo goofy ass!


Finally, in my condo, I sit on my couch and immediately turn on my tv and mute the random game. I scroll through my collection of tunes and decide to soothe my thoughts to melodies of some more Neo-Soul. My phone dings from a text and it’s Kaiden asking me if my calling her was a mistake. I shake my head wondering why she didn’t just call me back. Yes, the answer is yes; I’m so dumb. This must mean she doesn’t really want to talk to me. So maybe this is more casual than I thought. Did I miss the signs? I don’t even bother answering because the consensus is that I’m probably in the friend zone. Throwing my phone aside I walk to the back so that I can place my laptop in my office and all of a sudden it starts chime. Is that my ringtone? I don’t remember changing it. I take my time heading back over because who could seriously be calling me right now? Not Kaiden, I know that for sure. I pick up my phone and instantly see my reflection staring back at me. My irritation is instantly replaced with panic when I see Kaiden’s name and she's trying to video chat. Without taking another second I answer, and my image is immediately replaced with her’s. She’s so damn beautiful. Her smile meets mine and I can finally see this evening looking up. She looks like she’s been sleeping or crying? Her eyes are glossy but even so, she is the epitome of Black being so damn beautiful. 

“Hey you.” Her voice is small, quiet, yet sweet.

“Hey stranger. How are you doing tonight?”

“I’m good, I wasn’t sure if you got my text, so I decided to call you back, just in case.”

“I’m glad you did.” She giggles but I don’t know if that was actually something to ‘LOL’ about or just circumstantial for how awkward this shit is going right now. I wait for her to respond so I don’t make it worse but damn, how can I possibly turn this middle school rhetoric around?

“So, what are you up to this evening? No plans with friends lined up?” she insinuates.

“Not really, I just couldn’t get you out of my head.” My body tenses the moment I finish that dumb ass sentence. Did you really just say that, my G? Corny as hell.

The once quiet and simple conversation has now been replaced with a gut busting cackle escaping her lips. I mean her head flew back so hard I was sure it left her shoulders. She proceeds to tell me how sorry she was for her joy in place of my embarrassment and I have to admit it was quite comical. 

“Thinking about me, huh? Okay. Well, please elaborate?” She says, still trying to calm her laughter.

I relax in relief of that brief dread and quickly lighten up. The conversation at this point becomes so effortless that I start to think that maybe I am more to her than I initially thought. But I try not to get ahead of myself and assume like I did last time. She continues on by telling me about her crazy work life balance, but I can tell she's holding back. It’s more than just work, there are other things she’s decided aren’t meant for me. Yet. And that’s okay. I let her tell me whatever it is she wants. I’m just happy that she's able to talk to me the way she is at this very moment. No pressure, just friendly banter and great conversation. Before I know it, we are discussing current events, our families, and sports. Sports. I think I’ve found the one ladies and gentlemen. The dialogue flowed for hours and to be honest I wasn't ready to get off, but her yawn signaled that It was time. 

“Well it’s getting pretty late and I don’t want to keep you, but before I let you go, what are you doing Sunday night?”

To be continued...